Gaps
by Krazy Ky-Sta Hatter
Summary: Rose has gaps in her memory. She can't remember whole hours. What does her missing memories have to do with the strange energy spikes happening around London? And what could her horrifying dreams of the Doctor's death mean? Something about her has changed and she is the only one who can save the man that she once loved.
1. Missing Memories

_**Okay, I've had this one rattling around in my head for a while now, but never got around to writing it. Since I annoyingly seem to have gotten a minor case of writers block on some of my other stories (struggling to get them from point B to point C), this one decided it wanted to be written.**_

_**It's set in the parallel world, post Journey's end. I know that some of you aren't huge fans of the Metacrisis, but the Time Lord will come into it eventually too.**_

_**Hope you like it.**_

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**Missing Memories**

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Rose woke up with a gasp. It was freezing! Had the Doctor opened the window agai-

She looked around in shock. In the hazy light of dawn she could see the small lake that was clearly not part of her bedroom. Surrounding her were trees and stretches of long wild grass, not the walls of her house. Where the hell was she?

She stood up, shivering as the cold air whipped her tiny silk nightdress about her thighs. As she did, she noticed something odd. She was right in the center of… some kind of explosion? The long grass she was in had been blown outwards from her for a good two or three meters. The closer to her it was, the flatter, and eventually the more burnt it became.

How the hell had she gotten here? Did this have anything else to do with…?

Shaking her head, she turned and ran. She didn't really know where she was going, but eventually she stumbled into a car park. Quickly, she spotted her own car. It was the only one there. Somewhat panicked, she jumped in and started the car.

It wasn't until she was out on the road that she recognised where she was. She was in the London Farmlands. It hadn't existed in her original universe, but here there had been a whole area of London that it was illegal to build the city on. It was kept as wild as possible, aside from the actual farm and a few nature trails.

And it was a half hour drive away from her home… There was no way that she could have driven here in her sleep, was there? Maybe it had something to do with the gaps…

She was actually starting to get very scared. There were moments of her life where whole hours were missing. Thankfully nothing of her past. But she would suddenly find herself somewhere, a few hours after the last time she had looked at a clock, with no memory of how she got there.

At first she thought it was nothing. She hadn't bothered to tell the Doctor because she didn't want to worry him. Then as it happened more, she thought it might have been a problem with her brain, but a visit to the doctor - a medical one - proved that theory wrong. But now this… this was something else.

Now, this was getting out of hand. She should really tell the Doctor. She had to.

**?...DW…?**

By the time Rose got home it was quarter to six in the morning. She crept in as quietly as possible; she knew that the Doctor liked his sleep in the mornings. But as she pulled back the covers and climbed in, the movement woke him up.

The Doctor grumbled a little as he turned over and looked up at her with bleary eyes. "Hello," he mumbled. "Having trouble sleeping?"

"What?" she said, a little puzzled. He had known she had been gone for hours in the middle of the night and he wasn't worried?

"You woke me up one of the other times you got up last night," he said, his voice still sleepy. "How many times have you gotten up now?"

"Erm…"

Suddenly he started when he touched her skin, the coolness of it jolting him into full awareness. "Geez, Rose, you're freezing!" he cried, pulling the duvet up around her more and drawing her into him. "Were you outside?"

"Ah… Doctor," she said hesitantly. "There's something… I need to… I need to tell you something… And-"

She was cut off as two ringtones filled the room. Normally, they would have let it go. The Doctor was slightly worried about the way she was acting right now. But their phones only ever rang at the same time for one reason.

An important Torchwood call.

"The Doctor and Rose," the Doctor answered his phone first. A second later Rose's stopped ringing. "Is it serious?" he asked, clearly a little frustrated. "Right, well, you're lucky we were already awake. Where did this spike happen? -…- I see. Okay, pack my equipment. We'll meet you there."

"What have we got?" Rose asked.

"Strange energy spikes. Reports of sightings. They want us there now while the readings are still fairly fresh."

"Alright," she groaned, getting up again. She started to get changed into her usual mostly black Torchwood gear. A tight fitting three quarter top, a… top far too big for her? "Shirt," she called to the Doctor, tossing it over to him.

He spun around and caught it. At the same time he tossed a bundle at her and called, "Pants."

She caught the dark blue denim and pulled them on. Then she put on her leather coat and all the things she would need for a field mission. She looked over at the Doctor, who was wearing a black pinstripe suit. It was a little more casual than the ones he favoured, but he liked it. She had made sure that he at least attempted to get a bit more of a widespread variety of clothing. He was a little sad that he no longer had his coat, but she had found a similar black one that he wore on missions.

He still downright refused to wear any shoes other than chucks.

In a way this made her happy. It remind her that things really were how they used to be… only minus the TARDIS… It had taken him a while to get of the loss of his ship. But he said she was worth it.

"Miss Tyler," he smiled, holding an arm out to her.

"Mr Tyler," she replied, looping her arm though his, and they made their way to his car. This made the Doctor chuckle.

"Why am I Mr Tyler all of a sudden?"

"Because we are getting married in two months, and Chris Meta isn't even your real name."

"So I'm changing my name to Tyler? But then the Metacrisis joke doesn't work!" he complained.

"Tony says you have to," she said with her tongue in teeth grin.

The Doctor sighed in defeat. "Damn. A 905 year old Human / Time Lord Metacrisis, stumped by a three year old."

"You're just a big softy," she laughed as they got into the car.

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If anything, Rose was more than happy with her life right now… Well, aside from the gaps. If anyone had asked her a year ago, she would have said she was confused as hell.

At first she had been hurt and angry that the Time Lord Doctor hadn't wanted her. She had accepted very quickly that the Metacrisis really was him. She knew he was. She was just very upset.

To his credit, her Doctor had been patient and understanding for that first week. They never really sat down and just talked about it, thankfully - she didn't think she would have been able to handle that. But they did both say what was necessary.

He had told her how hard it would have been for the other him to just walk away. When she had been upset that he hadn't even said goodbye, he had started with 'you know he doesn't like goodbyes', but had then changed to 'I don't think he could handle watching us. I wouldn't have'. She really wasn't sure weather this made her feel better or worse.

But in time she had come to accept that the Time Lord Doctor had done what he thought was right, even though it wasn't at all what he wanted… just like always. And she was happy here. Even though she sometimes still missed the Time Lord, she loved her Doctor just as much… Perhaps even a little more considering.

He had started working with her at Torchwood not long after they got settled down in a new house. He had said he needed something to stave off the insane boredom. And at least at Torchwood he could put his knowledge to good use without feeling he had to hold back.

He had proposed to her a few months back. It wasn't a big thing. That was never his style. In fact, they had just been lying on the sofa together, just enjoying cuddling each other, when he had casually asked her.

"Marry me?" he had said as he played with her hair.

She had turned in his arms and blinked at him in bewilderment. "W-what?"

"Marry me," he repeated with a shrug. She had kissed him then and he had laughed. "So, was that a yes?"

"Yes."

By the next night she had a ring. Just a simple, thin band of silver. It had a nice sized sapphire with two small diamonds either side. On the sapphire a tiny pattern of circles had been etched… It was Gallifreyan. He refused to tell her what it meant. He would tell her later.

But she did recognise it. She had seen it in a book she had found in the other universe. She had seen it while she was travelling dimensions and had ended up a few years in the future. There was a book called 'A Journal of Impossible Things'. She had seen the Doctor mentioned and bought a copy, only to discover his months as John Smith. There were images of pages from his journal, and there, beside her image, was this symbol.

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She looked about, slightly startled that she had slipped so deep into her thoughts. But not as startled as when she saw where they were. They were passing through the country roads of the London Farmlands.

"W-What are we doing here?" she asked him.

"I thought you'd fallen asleep," he chuckled. "We're in the Farmlands. That's where the spike came from."

"…What kind of spike, exactly?" she asked warily.

"Not sure. That's what I'm hoping to find out. Apparently there's a witness. Said he saw something strange. Suzie and Jake are questioning him. I'm just glad they didn't let Owen do it. You know, I think they've finally learnt their lesson."

"Mmm, too bad he hasn't," she muttered, making the Doctor chuckle again.

She mentally crossed her fingers and hoped they weren't going where she thought they were going… but of course they were. She suppressed her groan as they drove into the car park she had left little over an hour ago. This time it wasn't empty, save her car. There were already two Torchwood cars and a truck.

She started walking towards the path she figured she'd stumbled up when she noticed the Doctor looking between the paths, unsure as to which one had been taken.

"I think it's this one," she told him. "All the cars are by it," she reasoned. It was better than saying, 'I was on this one this morning when I woke up in the center of a mini explosion with no memory of how I got there'. No, that could wait.

As they walked down the track, it became clear there was an investigation going on. There was tape and signs and people stopping others from entering.

"Hello, Ross," the Doctor greeted the guard as he let them through. He then turned to Rose. "Good guess," he grinned. Rose said nothing.

As they came out by the lake, Rose could see the full extent of what had happened. The hazy beginnings of morning didn't show her half as much as this.

Not far from the edge of the lake was the spot she had woken up… it spread much further than she originally thought. The burnt patch was just a little bigger than the spread of her outstretched arms, and the flattened grass around it went for at least three meters. But that wasn't all. Powdering the ground around the area was a thin layer of what looked like golden dust. It made the grass shimmer and where it floated on the water, it glistened.

Rose shook her head in disbelief and found herself staggering when the action made her lightheaded. She had a really horrible headache, and it was only really catching up to her now, but she was _exhausted_.

"Whoa, you okay there, Rose?" a familiar voice said as strong hands caught her.

Blinking, she smiled up at Captain Jack Harkness… Well, this universe's version of him anyway. He wasn't immortal here. They had found him trying to scam some teenagers with faulty future tech and had convinced him to join Torchwood.

"Harkness, hands off my fiancé," the Doctor growled.

"I was just making sure she's okay," he replied.

"I'm fine, Jack," Rose told him. "I'm just really tired."

"He been keeping you up all night," he teased, wagging his eyebrows. She just rolled her eyes and gave him a punch on the arm. She didn't deny it… but she knew that was not the reason. "Oh, you got a bit of dirt on your cheek." He wiped at it for her. Turning away, Rose began to rub vigorously. Crap… dirt on her cheek could only have been from lying on the ground.

"Anything new?" the Doctor asked.

"Well, there's the gold dust for one thing," Jack told him. "And the spike was bigger and longer. But there's just… I don't know, something about this one is different to the others."

"Others?" Rose cried in alarm.

"Yep," the Doctor said, popping the 'p'. "This isn't the first… actually, it's about the… thirteenth."

"And why wasn't I told about this?"

"Well, we tried at the time. But your cellphone always goes right to voicemail," the Doctor replied, scratching the back of his neck. "You seem to be going AWOL a lot, lately."

"And you couldn't have told me later?" She was panicking, and she realised that it was almost sounding like anger. Thirteen. There had been thirteen of these strange… things. She hadn't exactly been counting these gaps, but she would bet anything that there had been around thirteen. Could she really have done this?

No. Don't be stupid.

"This one's different from the other's," their team mate, Ana, called out.

"Told you," Jack grinned. "Why's that, Sweetheart?" he called back.

"Look at this," she replied pointing to the ground. She was the teams tracking expert. "At the others there were no tracks at all, like they were too light to make any, weren't really there, or just didn't touch the ground. This… it has marks all over it. They've lain down here, curled in a bit of a ball. Humanoid, fairly small. Footprints look human too, about a woman's five and a half in size. Then they've gotten up, and they've run in this direction… and up the path," she sighed, knowing it meant they had an alien on the loose.

"Five and a half?" the Doctor questioned. "You can tell the shoe size?"

Ana shrugged. "The prints are about the same size as my feet. I'm a five and a half."

"Well, that matched the description," Jake said, walking over. "A farmer saw it from a bit of a distance, came a bit closer. Couldn't see what she looked like, but he said that it was a woman. Golden hair, tiny dress. Did some big light show then fell unconscious. Woke up, panicked and bolted. He tried to follow her, but she drove off in a car."

"So it's human?" Jack said in surprise.

"Could be Rose," the Doctor teased.

"What?" Rose squeaked and froze.

"You've been touching your hair," he rolled his eyes and started dusting at it. "You've got gold all through it… and you are size five and a half." Rose smiled nervously. She didn't want to tell him. Not with everyone else here. Yes, she trusted them - well, she had her doubts about Suzie - but she wasn't ready for the scrutiny she would get from them all.

"What I don't get," the Doctor said loudly to them all, "is how out of place this one is."

"Yeah, genius, we've already figured out that this one's different," Owen scoffed.

"No, I don't just mean the prints and the level and the… really weird gold dust. It's out of pattern. All the other spikes have only lasted a few seconds. It happens exactly on the hour."

He pulled out an electronic pad and used his hand to pull up a holographic map. "3am. 12am. 11pm. 1pm. 9am. 7pm. 4am. 10am. 10pm. 12pm. 5am. 7pm. 5pm," he listed them in order of happening as he pin pointed them on the map. "But this one. It lasted minutes, from Tosh's readings, it went for at least twenty minutes around four, five am. Right here." He put another dot on the map. "Anyone else starting to see the pattern."

"It's in the middle," Rose said.

"Exactly. It's in the middle. But not just in the middle, _exactly _the middle. These other ones are starting to form a perfect circle around here. They're all exactly two miles away. And look at the pattern."

Rose did a quick count. "They're going in order… like a clock."

"Uh-huh," he nodded, happy she got it. "And it goes up to 11pm, therefore we can assume-"

"It's a twenty four hour clock."

"Which means," he grinned. "There's going to be about twelve more."

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_**Dun dun dun! What is Rose to do? Will she tell the Doctor?**_


	2. Will be True

**Will be True**

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Rose blinked in surprise. She really oughtn't to be by now. But she was. This was not where she had been only a second ago. As far as she was concerned, she had been walking back to her car after finishing lunch. Now she was walking up the driveway to her house.

She looked down at her watch. It was about quarter after two in the afternoon. And she felt like she had spent an entire day pushing around boulders or something. She was _so_ exhausted, both mentally and physically. Though she had no memory of why she would feel this way at all. She now had the horrible sinking feeling that she knew what had happened.

Her phone began to ring. In a state of slight disorientation, it took a moment for her to realise what it was.

"Hello?" she answered, her voice slurring slightly.

"Rose!" the Doctor sounded relieved. "I've been trying to call you for the last fifteen minutes. There's been another spike. Can you believe it? Two in one day! That's never happened before."

"Really?" she said, the exhaustion obvious in her voice.

"Yes, and I was right. This one happened at precisely two pm, exactly two miles away from the spot this morning, right in the spot I said that two pm would happen!"

"And… and you didn't see what happened?" she asked.

"Well, erm, no, not exactly. We put up cameras in the predicted areas, but about a minute before two, the camera just went static. It's like electronic devices can't handle the power. And we weren't personally _watching_ the area. See, thing is, even though we now know where they're going to happen, the timing is unpredictable. We don't know what hour she's going to go for next. Pete says that he can't afford to have that many people on a stakeout for however long."

"Oh…" she said. Then no one would have seen her… assuming that it was her. "Doctor. There's something I have to talk to you about… Just us. Can you come home?" She realised how small her voice sounded.

"Rose, are you okay?" he asked in concern.

"I don't know," she replied. There was a moment's pause on the other end, she could faintly hear voices in the background. Then he was back.

"I've left this one to Jack," the Doctor finally said. "I'll be there in a few moments." The phone disconnected, and Rose sighed as she shut it and put it in her pocket. She rummaged around for a moment for the key, but couldn't find it.

In the end she grabbed the spare key from the garden and went inside. She just dumped everything she was carrying in the doorway, then flopped down on the couch.

In the next minute she was dead to the world.

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_* An alarm blared irritatingly around them._  
"_You said we'd die. For the future, for the human race!" a woman was shouting. Adelaide Brooke. And there, there in front of her was the Doctor in an orange spacesuit… He looked almost insane, his eyes filled with a darkness she had never seen before. Even the anger that had earned him the name 'the Oncoming Storm' had nothing on this look. It sent shivers of horror down her spine.  
_"_Yes, because there are laws. There a laws of time. And once upon a time there were people in charge of those laws, but they died. They all DIED," his voice cracked. "Do you know who that leaves? ME! It's taken all this time for me to realise that the laws of time are mine, and THEY WILL OBEY ME!"_

_* "If I have to fight you as well, then I will," he warned darkly._

_* "We're not just fighting the flood, we're fighting time it's self… AND I'M GOING TO WIN!" Losing. He was SO sick of losing._

_* "No, no, no, no, no. See, someone told me recently I was going to die. Said, 'he will knock four times'. Now, I think I know what that means, and it doesn't mean right here, right now, because I don't hear anyone knocking, do you?_

_* "No one should have that much power!"_  
"_Tough," he replied flatly._

_* "Who the HELL are you?" a girl cried, before turning and running away from the Doctor in fear._

_* "For a long time now, I thought I was just a survivor, but I'm not. I'm the winner. That's who I am. The Time Lord Victorious!"  
_"_And there's no one to stop you?"  
_"_No."_

_* There was a flash as the woman pulled the trigger of her laser gun. She fell to the ground, having given her life to correct the timeline that had been wronged._

_* A look of horror came over the Doctor's face as he stared at the house. "I've gone too far…" He fell to his knees in the snow. "Is this it?" his voice shook with tears. "My death? Is it time?"_

_* "No," he said determinedly, reaching for the controls. He would run from it. Run from it all. His past. His future. His pain. He would not let it end like this. He would not let it end._

_* "He will knock four times…."_

_* A man with beached blonde hair, wearing a dirty black hoodie smashed a pipe against a bin. Beating out the drumming that was ever present in his head. Bang, bang, bang, bang._

_* Tap, tap, tap, tap._

_* "Even when I change, it FEELS like dying," the Doctor said quietly to his old friend, Donna's granddad, Wilf. "Everything that I am dies. Some new man goes sauntering away. And I'm dead." He struggled to hold back the tears. He didn't want to go. He didn't. He had had the best of times. He liked who he was. For once… he just wanted things to stay the same. To be right._

_* "And how about you?" Wilf asked. "Who have you got now?"  
_"_No one. I'm travelling alone… I thought it would get better…" He was really struggling to hold the tears back, and his voice shook. "But I did some things, it went wrong."_

_* "The Time Lords are returning!"_

_* With a crash, the Doctor fell through the glass roofing and smashed onto the floor at the feet of the Lord President of Gallifrey._

_* The click of a gun echoes through the room…_

_* "You die with me, Doctor."  
_"_I know."_  
"_Get out of the way," the man behind him warned. Returning the favour, and getting his revenge._

_* Tap, tap, tap, tap._

_* "He will knock four times…."_

_* Tap, tap, tap, tap. The Doctor froze. He turned slowly to face Wilf, who stood in a glass chamber._

_* "50,000 rads, about to flood that thing."  
_"_Well, you better let me out then," Wilf said, still shaken.  
_"_Except it's gone critical. Touch one control and it floods. Even this would set it off…" he said forlornly, playing with the sonic-screwdriver. He knew what had to come next._

_* "Look at you, not remotely important. But me? I could do so. Much. MORE! SO MUCH MORE! But this is what I get," he deflated. "My reward… Well it's not fair!" With a sweep, he knocked everything off the table. Then he stood there, his breathing heavy.  
He was upset… because he knew what came next. He didn't want it to be like this.  
_"_Oh… I've lived too long."_

_* "Wilfred… it's my honour."_

_* The Doctor groaned as the radiation hit. He fell against the glass. He sunk to his knees, the pain unbearable. The cries wrenched their way from his throat. He curled in a ball as the agony continued._

_* "I'm going to die."_

_* The Time Lords are returning!"_

_* The click of a gun echoes through the room…_

_* "I'm going to die."_

_* He will knock four times…."_

_* Tap, tap, tap, tap._

_* "It's my honour."_

_* "I'm going to die."_

_* Save him._

.

"ROSE!"

The voice startled her awake and she sat bolt upright to see the frightened, concerned face of her Doctor. They stared at each other a moment and she trembled. Then a sob escaped her lips and he pulled her desperately into a hug.

"It's alright. I've got you," he whispered, stroking her hair. "It wasn't real."

"But it was," she croaked. "It… it will be true. It _was_." Her voice stuttered as her body tried to drag in haggard breaths, her sobs causing her to hyperventilate.

"It was just a dream, Rose," he tried to comfort her and calm her breathing. But she just couldn't calm down.

"He - he was dying. He was going to die. Everyone was telling him he was going to die. And he was going to knock four times. And he had a gun. And the mad man. The man with the drums in his head. And the Lord President. And the Time Lords were returning. And Wilfred Nobel was stuck. And radiation. And he was burning. It was killing him. He was dying and nothing could save him. And I have to help him. And I can't. And-"

"Rose!" the Doctor shouted over top of her. He was alarmed, and she was hysterical. He looked her in the eye and stroked her hair from her face, frowning when he noticed it was still tinged gold from the powder that morning. "It was a dream. We're all safe. No one's going to die. I promise."

"Doctor, what does it feel like when you regenerate?" He sighed, not understanding where this was coming from. But it seemed he would get nowhere with her otherwise.

"Well," he started. "You've seen it. At first it hurts… I'm rewriting my entire cellular structure. But I just change. It's a little strange, being in a new body, but it's good. I'm still me."

"Tell me the truth!" she sobbed, pounding on his chest. He caught her hands and she gave up hitting him. Her hands were shaking so bad. Feeling very scared for her, he reached up and wiped the tears from her face. As he did, his hand grazed her forehead and he gasped at how hot it was. Placing his palm on her head only confirmed that.

"Rose, you're burning up!"

"Even when I change, it _feels_ like dying," she mumbled quietly, making the Doctor pause. "Everything that I am dies. Some new man goes sauntering away. And I'm dead. That's what he said." She sniffed. "Is that what it feels like?"

The Doctor hesitated, slightly shocked that she would know that. It was exactly how he saw regeneration. The down side to it. And it stirred something in him. Something about that seemed vaguely familiar. It was like she had plucked the words from his head. "…Yeah," he replied quietly. "Yeah, it is."

"He's going to die," her voice trembled.

"It was just a nightmare," he said as he picked her up and carried her to their room.

"What if it wasn't?"

"Rose, stop this. You're sick. Stop worrying yourself." He was very concerned for her right now. She was in such a panic. Gently, he put her down on their bed and kissed her burning forehead. That's when she dropped the bomb.

"I caused the spikes," she blurted.

"What?" he said in bewilderment.

"Well, I'm not sure. But I've been having blackouts. One second I'm here, next I'm somewhere else, hours after. This morning I woke up beside that lake in the middle of the explosion thingy. It was me."

"Rose, don't be silly." It couldn't have been her. He would know, wouldn't he? And she was human.

"I don't remember the last two hours before you called me. I'm completely exhausted for 'no reason'."

"That doesn't mean that-"

"Look at my nightdress! As much as he didn't want to, as much as he wanted to deny what she was saying, his eyes flicked to the nightdress that was lying on the floor. It was mottled with colours that shouldn't be there. The black of ash and the gold of the dust…

"No, but… how did…" he was absolutely baffled. How could it have been her? "Rose, what's happening?"

"I don't know," she whimpered. He climbed into the bed and held on to her. "I - I only really just figured that out this morning… when I woke up in the middle of the burnt spot. Size five and a half foot, remember."

"Okay, so you _might_ have had something to do with the spikes. What about the dream?"

"I think it's real," she whispered, burrowing deeper into his chest.

"What happened?"

"It was you," she told him. "The Time Lord you. He looked… I think he's gone insane."

"Wouldn't surprise me," the Doctor muttered. But Rose wasn't listening. She was trying to sort the jumble of images in her head so they made _some_ sense.

"He was travelling alone. He said he was sick of losing. That since he's the last left, the Time Lord Victorious, the laws of time should obey him. He saved some people he shouldn't have, and one of them, Adelaide, I think… Adelaide Brooke, she committed suicide to keep the timelines intact. And he knew he'd gone too far."

"Blimey," the Doctor breathed. He was actually starting to get _really_ scared now. There was no way that Rose could know anything about Adelaide Brook.

"He was told that he was going to die. They said 'he will knock four times'. There was a man. A mad man, he kept knocking four times… like the drums in his head. But I think, in the end, he saved the other Doctor's life… From the Time Lords. The Time Lords were returning. But it was Donna's granddad, Wilfred. He was trapped in this glass box and he knocked four times, asking to be let out. But it was going to flood with radiation… and he did it. He said 'it's my honour', and let him out."

She shuddered as she remembered how he had screamed in agony…

"I… I wish I could say that was a dream…" the Doctor said quietly. "I don't know what it was, or how you saw it… But there's no way you could know about Adelaide Brooke. And I've never told you that the Master could hear drums in his head."

"So he's going to die?"

"Radiation… He'll only regenerate. But Rose… it's most likely already happened and just echoed back to you."

"No," she shook her head vehemently. "It hasn't. It hasn't happened. It can't of." She let out another whimper and she clutched her head.

"Rose?" he said in concern.

"My head," she gasped. "It's killing me!"

The Doctor froze, the last time she had said that flashing though his memory. But… no, she couldn't! It had been years! Years and nothing was wrong. She'd been to the doctors hundreds of times, she was fine. She couldn't have been affected by it.

But the spikes, the gold dust, the dreams. Also earlier he had found that the energy signature they spikes' were giving off were a mix of Artron energy and Temporal energy… It was all pointing to one thing.

"Rose," he said quietly. "I know you really don't want to do this now, but we have to go to Torchwood." Rose just whimpered in reply, still clutching at her burning head. This made the Doctor truly begin to panic. "Please, Rose. I need to know what's going on. I need to know what's happening to you. I _need_ you to be okay. It's just a few tests. No one else will see it. You don't even have to do anything."

Her only response this time was to curl into a tighter ball. Fear spread through him faster than it ever had in his life. His lab was at Torchwood. If something was happening to her, he couldn't do anything about it this time. Not like he had the other time, he didn't have that ability to manipulate it anymore.

Her only chance was if they got to his lab. If she got worse, he may be able to do something.

He noticed her body relax as she slipped into unconsciousness. Quickly, he swept her up in his arms and headed to the car, not even bothering to lock the door. He had to get to Torchwood. _Now!_

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* * *

_***Gasp!* What's going to happen to Rose?**_

_**This actually wasn't my original plan. The Doctor was supposed to find out much later when there were only one or two spikes left. He was supposed to be worried about her for a long time before he saw her go all vortex-y. But it's pretty obvious. In the first chapter he was just joking about and didn't really make the connections, plus he only had half the information. Then he's in denial. And now full out panic.**_

_**In the next chapter, see what they discover… and what someone else discovers too.**_


	3. Tests and Promises

_**Hello. Just a short one this time. The next chapter shouldn't be too far behind, though. It's already half typed up, and the other half is in my notebook.**_

* * *

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.

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**Tests and Promises**

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Rose, once again, found herself somewhere completely different, with no memory of getting there. She went to look at her watch, only to find she was hooked up to a machine. She gasped and began to panic, reaching to take all the needles and electrodes off.

The panic sped up her heart rate, causing a machine to beep wildly. This must have grabbed someone's attention, because someone came running in.

"Oh, Rose, thank god!" she heard the familiar voice say. She looked up in time to see the Doctor envelop her in his arms.

"What happened?" she asked. "Did I…?"

"Did you…? Oh. Oh, no. You collapsed. You had me so worried! I thought I was going to lose you!"

"Why am I…" She poked her head up to see where she was. "…In your lab?"

"It was the only place I could do anything to save you if it got worse," he told her. "And after what's been happening, I wanted to run a few tests. I started most of them when you were unconscious."

"And no one noticed you carrying an unconscious woman through the lobby?" she said. He just nodded to his car, which was parked in the loading area of his basement level lab. "Ah, we snuck in."

"I didn't want anyone else knowing about this. Not Torchwood. Your mum and dad, yes. But I don't know if we can _completely_ trust the rest."

They were interrupted as the door to the lab opened and Jack snuck in. He paused for a moment when he saw Rose, still hooked up to all the machines. Then he ran to them, a look of panic on his face.

"Rose! What happened? What's wrong?" he cried.

"I'm fine, Jack," she said tiredly. Jack raised a sceptical eyebrow.

"She collapsed from exhaustion. I was worried," the Doctor said. It wasn't a lie. Jack still just gave them a sceptical look.

"Right," he drew the word out. "Look, there's something I need to talk to you about. I don't really want to tell anyone else, I don't know what they'd do."

"What is it?" The Doctor asked, shifting Rose to a better spot beside him, but not letting go.

"Could either of you tell me what this was doing at the latest spike spot?" He held up a very familiar necklace with their house key on it (a personal joke between the two of them) and Rose raised her hand to her bare throat. "Rose wasn't there, so why was this?"

"Jack, it's…"

"Look," he said gently. "I know that something is going on. Something to do with the spikes. We can never reach her when they're happening. The person seen at the big spike was a short blonde woman, size five and a half shoe. She had ash on her face and gold dust in her hair when she only just arrived. And I found her necklace when she wasn't there at all. You're lucky no one else noticed these. I just want to help."

The Doctor sighed. They knew this Jack was a lot like the one they used to know. They knew he could be trusted. "We're not too sure at the moment, Jack." When Jack opened his mouth to argue, the Doctor cut him off. "Yes, you're right about all that. The thing is, Rose doesn't remember it. Something happened to her a while back, I've just run some tests to see if they're connected."

"Have you checked her for Artron energy?"

"Jack, she travelled through time and space for two, three years. Of _course_ she's going to have Artron energy. She's also most likely seeped in Void stuff, and probably Temporal energy too."

"Yeah, but if she's using bursts of them, then wont it be using up her supplies?"

The Doctor's eyebrows skyrocketed, surprised by the idea. Kissing Rose's head, he moved her to the side and jumped up, grabbing his new sonic-screwdriver. He had finally been able to finish it when Jack leant him the Vortex Manipulator. - Actually, he'd gotten a lot of things on that trip, including his own Vortex Manipulator. His plan was to find a way onto Gallifrey (if it existed here) and steal another TARDIS. - Changing the setting, he pointed it at Rose and scanned her. Once again, his eyebrows practically rose into his hairline when he saw the results.

"Crap! You don't just _have_ Temporal and Artron energy, you're radiating mass amounts of it! It's not depleting because you're only making more."

"Doctor, what is this connected to?" she asked.

"The Time Vortex. I think it has to do with the time you absorbed the Time Vortex."

"But how could this be possible?" she said. "That was years ago, and nothing else has happened. I - I've been fine. We would have noticed on the TARDIS, right?" The Doctor looked at the ground, not saying anything. "_Right_?"

"I don't know, Rose," he said. "We never ran tests. We barely paid attention. At first we were too preoccupied by my regeneration, and we never really noticed anything after that. But why would we. You don't seem to remember these things and at the time, I was trying to pay as little attention to you as I could. - You know how denial works. - Not to mention the fact that we _did_ seem to get separated a lot that year. New Earth - it was a wonder you held out so long with Cassandra in your head. Torchwood Estate, the ship with prerevolutionary France, the first time we came to this universe, Krop Tor, the Queen's coronation, 2012 Olympics, the other Torchwood. Then there was all that time here when no one else would have known what to look for."

"But the gaps in my memories only started a few weeks ago!"

"There could have been many times you wouldn't have noticed it, Rose," the Doctor said. "When you were asleep, when you weren't paying attention. It might not have even been something strong enough to make you go MIA like you have been."

"But what… what have I been doing? I mean, I'm making these spikes, for some reason in time based circle… but for what?"

"I don't know… some sort of… power spot? The energy you create at each point will eventually focus on the center spot, making it weaker and-" He cut off as some sort of realisation came over him. His mouth just hung open for a moment. "… You said… you needed to help him…"

"What?" Rose said in confusion.

"Doctor! You better come look at this," Jack said. While they were talking, they hadn't even noticed that he had gone off, and was now looking at the finished test results. The Doctor stood and made his way over to their friend.

"What is it?" he said.

Jack said nothing. He just handed over the paper that held her test results with a rather solemn expression. The Doctor took them and scanned over them, his face falling with each page. Then he went back and reread it, making sure he'd gotten it right.

"What's wrong?" Rose said in concern. The Doctor just looked up at her with sad eyes. then he walked back over and held her by the shoulders.

"Rose," he said. "I know what you're trying to do when you cause the spikes. You're trying to weaken the walls of the universe so you can crack through and save the other me from whatever you saw in that dream. And-" He stopped and sighed deeply. "You have to do it. You have to go back."

"But… but then I'd be separated from you…" she said, confusion strong in her voice. She looked up into his serious sad eyes, and the realisation dawned on her. He knew that. He knew that if she went back, she probably wouldn't be able to make it back to this universe again. She'd never see him again. "No!"

"Rose-"

"No! No, I'm not going to! I am not leaving you!"

"Rose, you _have_ to."

"No I bloody well don't! You said so yourself, he'll only regenerate. It's horrible and I don't like it, but he knew it would happen some time. As much as I care for him, I'm not going to leave everything I have, everyone I _love_ to prevent something that there is _no_ way of stopping!"

"This isn't about him anymore. If you don't get back to the TARDIS soon, you will die! Your physiology has changed, _still_ is. And what you're doing is slowly draining you of energy… Not Temporal and Artron, but… never mind. The point is, I don't want to lose you either, but I would rather never see you again, _knowing_ that you are safe with someone I trust, than have you die in my arms!"

Rose blinked at him, not saying a thing.

"Then I'm taking you with me," she said eventually.

"I don't think that will work..."

"If I can break the walls of the universe, then I can bloody take you with me... I'll find a way." She nodded determinedly, even though her voice sounded unsure. The Doctor smiled at her weakly.

"You are so stubborn."

"And you love it," she teased. Then she sighed. "This means I'm never going to see everyone here ever again, am I?"

"You never know, we might be able to figure out a way back... but we'd never be able to stay here." He only put in the 'we' for her benefit. Something was telling him that he wasn't going to make it over with her.

Jack, after letting them have that moment, finally came over. "So, Doc," he said. "How much longer till she gets too bad?"

"At this rate... two weeks, max," the Doctor said.

"But the spikes have been going longer than that. She's only half way through!"

"I don't know, Jack!" he cried, frustration clear in his voice. His hand was running through his hair, making it even more wild than usual. "Maybe it won't take as long for the second half. She did two spikes today, maybe her body knows it has to speed up."

"I don't even know how I do it," Rose told them.

"I might be able to help with that. I'm still _half_ Time Lord. I haven't tried it yet, but I don't think I've lost most of my telepathic skills. I could go into your mind and try and trigger it."

"We'd have to monitor her, so she doesn't collapse again."

"Yep!"

"So.. that's it?" she said. "I don't really get a say? I don't get to try and find another way around this? I just have to go?!"

"I'm sorry," the Doctor said. He sat down beside her again and cupped her face in his hand. "But I would do anything to see you safe. I want you to promise me that whatever happens you will get back to the TARDIS, okay?"

Rose hesitated too long for him to be comfortable, but he was reassured by her answer.

"Okay."


	4. Cracks

**Cracks**

.

"But, if it's kind of like the first time, then I should be able to do it," Rose said.

"I mean, it's not like I'm possessed. I'm still me, so I'll know what I want. And I have the power of the _Time Vortex_. If I can make the other Jack immortal, taking you with me will be no problem."

"Let's just see if we can bring it out without having to wait. I would like my fiancé to live past the next week so I can marry her," the Doctor said. "I'd also like to know how you still have it in you, and why it hasn't killed you sooner."

"Did you get this 'worrying' thing from Donna?" Rose teased. The Doctor just rolled his eyes.

It was the day after Rose had collapsed, and the test results were locked safely in his draw, away from everyone... including Rose. There was another reason he was getting her to go. He didn't like it, and he was guessing he knew she wouldn't either. So he was going to tell her later... He was!

In the mean time, he had worked out how they could fit in two or three spikes in a day. If they stuck to his schedule, they should be done in four days... Only four days left with Rose...

Right now, they sat in his car, just outside the 8am point.

It all hinged on two things. If they could trigger it, and if it stayed a secret, the last thing they needed was the rest of Torchwood sniffing about this. Pete could only do so much... Speaking of which, they still needed to tell Jackie and Pete what was going on.

.

"Okay, ready?" he said.

Rose nodded and he placed the tips of his fingers on her temples. He hadn't done this in a while, let alone as a human, so it was a bit like moving through a thick water like substance at first. Rose was good for her part, when she felt him at the edge of her mind, she relaxed, like he'd told her, and let him in.

He searched deeper into her mind, till he felt a burning spark of energy. Somehow the Time Vortex was stored safe within her, not harming her.

"I found it," he told her. "See if you can follow me with your mind and connect with it."

He could feel Rose concentrate, searching him out. Soon she was focused in on the spark and he withdrew from her mind

"How do I connect with it?" she said, her eyes still tightly closed.

"I don't know. I don't have the Time Vortex living inside of me, do I? Just… do what you think is right."

He watched as she continued to sit with her eyes closed. Slowly the air around them began to heat up and her skin started to almost shimmer. When she opened her eyes again… they were gold.

Rose just looked at him a moment, a sad expression on her face. Then, slowly, a smile crept up her lips, and she reached up and cupped his face with her hand.

"My Doctor," she said, her ethereal voice catching slightly. "Everything will be okay. It will turn out alright."

The Doctor said nothing, he smiled at her sadly and followed her out of the car. He watched as she walked purposefully to a seemingly random spot, stood with her arms out to her sides… and waited.

"So what are you doing?" he asked after a while.

"If I can put enough pressure in the right places, I can create a crack in the walls of the universe, stable enough to close back once I'm though."

"And how are you supposed to do that?"

"By creating the extra twenty-four pressure point around the unopened rift, I can get directly to the Time Vortex. The Time Vortex is always trying to heal itself. And it will make the trip through the Void shorter."

"I see… Why twenty-four?"

"It was the most I could allow without the Time Vortex completely taking over me and killing me. The more points, the quicker it will be, and the less energy I use."

"So, you're holding back the Time Vortex," the Doctor said, worry creeping back into his voice.

Rose nodded. "When this first happened, I took in the entire Vortex, but I couldn't handle it. I saw this. All of it. Everything that did happen and will happen. And what could have happened if certain paths were not taken. I had to make things right. So, when you took it out of me, I hid one tiny spark in my heart and mind. It let me build and immunity to it over time as it grew stronger. But I'm still not strong enough. I still can't handle what happens and what I see. When I'm like this, my mind is bigger, but it still hurts. I've been blacking out because I have to force myself not to remember. Or it would destroy me."

"I see… So it's part of you. You do know that it's changed your entire DNA structure? You're barely human anymore. You're going to live for a long time… Much longer than me."

"Yes. I know… but I won't remember it. You'll have to tell me later. And have faith. Everything will work out," she said. "Now stand back. I'm about to start."

"Alright," the Doctor said quietly. Then, doing as she asked, he backed away to where the car was parked.

Wind began to whip around their ankles and the air around Rose began to form almost a mini tornado. It began to shimmer, and slowly, she rose in the air until her feet were about level with his head. The gold in her eyes reached a new intensity. Then, she raised her glowing hands above her head and a bright bolt of energy sprung from them to the sky. It was so bright that it hurt the Doctor's eyes to look at, but he still tried.

There was a point in the sky where the energy stopped, as if it had hit a barrier. From there, it spread out, like giant gold cracks in the sky. Anyone who didn't know any better would think it were bizarre lightning.

It lasted for almost a minute, before the gold began to dissipate, and Rose sunk back to the ground.

"Rose!" he cried. He ran over to her, just in time to support her limp form and stop her from crumpling to the ground. Her eyes fluttered open and she looked tiredly up at him.

"Doctor? What…?" She looked around, then back at the car, confusion creasing her brow a second.

"It's okay," he told her. "It's over. How do you feel."

"I'm okay," she said. "A little tired. Do we _have_ to do more today?"

"If we want to get you back before you start to deteriorate, then yes."

"Aww," she groaned.

"Come on, we've got seven hours till the next one. Let's get you rested.

"Okay," Rose said as he led her back to the car. "It's weird, I don't usually snap out of it this soon."

"Perhaps you don't feel the need now that you're not trying to keep it from anyone." He started the car and left the place, before anyone could place them at that spot.

"Still, I don't get why I can't remember."

"I do," he told her, taking his eyes off the road for a second to flash her a cheeky grin. "We had a _very_ nice little chat while you were all gold and sparkly. You can't remember because your mind can't completely handle holding the Time Vortex yet."

"Yet?" she questioned. The Doctor's grip tightened on the wheel. "You mean I'm going to?" He gave a sharp nod, eyes fixed to the road. "But, how? If I can't now, what's going to make it any different later on?"

The Doctor sighed sadly. "It's because you're changing," he said darkly.

"Changing? what do you mean?" she asked fearfully.

"You held on to part of the Time Vortex, Rose. That's enough to change anyone. Prolonged exposure to it what changed the Time Lords into what they were. But you… it's been _inside_ you For four years. It's slowly been shaping you so you're accustomed to it."

"Accustomed to it?"

"Yes!" he said, frustration starting to show through his voice. He didn't want to be scaring Rose like he was, but he couldn't help it. He didn't like this one bit. "You bonded yourself to the Time Vortex . You are permanently part of it. I have your medical files at home... You're barely human anymore!"

"Th-then what am I?" she said in a small voice.

"I don't know," he sighed. "Well, I have an idea, but I don't have any way to test it. _He'll_ have to do it when you get back over."

"Why are you so adamant that you won't be coming with me?" she said.

"Why are you so adamant that I will?"

"I just am. I can feel it. Everything's going to be fine."

The Doctor said nothing to that. Because he was getting the exact opposite feeling. Despite his brain telling him that there would be no place for him in the other world, in his heart he could feel the sense of impending doom.

He knew that something was coming.

.

It was a very quiet ride home.

**?…DW…?**

"Sorry, Doctor. They pretty much forced me to call you," Jack said down the phone.

"It's okay, but you know I can't come in."

"Yeah, I know. I tried to tell them that Rose wasn't well. How is she now?"

Sighing, the Doctor turned, leaning back against the wall, and looked down into the lounge where Rose was asleep on the couch. "She's tired," he said. "She's asleep right now. I got more answers about her condition, though. She doesn't want to go through with the rest. She's scared."

"I can imagine," Jack said. "When is the next one?"

"3pm. I've timed them so that most of them are five hours apart. Some are, four, ten or twelve. Later it's at 8pm."

"And tomorrow?"

"1am, 11am, 4pm and 9pm. Then we're doing 2am, 2pm and 6pm. The next day, it's 6am, and we're done. Can you keep them off our trail? Rose snapped out of it immediately, she didn't have time to clean up like the other times."

"Yeah, sure. I'll tell them you're too busy looking after Rose to come round."

"Thank you, Jack."

"No problem, Doc. Keep that girl safe."

"Will do. See you later."

"See ya."

The Doctor hung up the phone, then went and sat on the couch opposite his fiancé with a sigh. There was one more thing they had to do, right away. And he had no idea how to go about it. He didn't really want Rose to know half of it, but he was gong to have to tell her.

Picking up the phone again, he dialled in a number he would all too happily delete.

"Hello?" came the reply. He sighed in relief when he heard that it was Pete's voice on the other line.

"Hey, Pete, it's me."

"Doctor, what can I do for you?"

"Ah, well… Something important has popped up. I need to speak with you and Jackie. Here. Soon as possible."

"Well, Jackie's just out at the park with Ton- Oh, never mind, she just walked through the door. We'll be there soon."

The phone disconnected and the Doctor put it back on the hook. Sighing, he sat down on the armchair next to Rose. She looked so tired. There were shadows beneath her eyes, and her brow was furrowed, even as she slept.

He did not like what was happening at all, but there was no way to stop it. And to top it all off, he had no idea how to handle what was coming next.

**?…DW…?**

After sitting on the couch worrying for twenty minutes, the Doctor practically jumped when the doorbell rang.

"Just a minute!" he called. Then he went to Rose and gently shook her awake. "Rose? Rose, wake up, sweetie. Your parents are here."

"What?" she said groggily, rubbing her eyes as she sat up.

"Hang on," he told her. "I'm coming!" he then called to the door, walking in that direction. He opened the door to see a worried looking Pete and Jackie. "Good you're here."

"Doctor, what's going on?" Pete asked.

"Come into the lounge," the Doctor said, his eyes flicking that way. "Rose is in there." The two of them did as he asked and followed him in.

"Rose!" Jackie cried, seeing the state of her daughter. "Are you alright? What's wrong?" She descended upon her and wrapped her in her arms.

"I'm okay," she mumbled. "Just tired."

"Now, what's wrong, Doctor?" Pete said, taking a set.

"Well," he drew out the word, sitting down himself. "Yesterday we found out what was causing the spikes… it was Rose." Pete opened his mouth, but the Doctor carried on before he could speak. "She has no memories of it. Thing is, something happened to her a long time ago, back in the other world. And it's taken all this time, but it's slowly changed her. She's not exactly human anymore. I'm not sure what she is, but we'll find out. The main point is, she's deteriorating. If we have any hope, she needs to get back to the TARDIS in the next few weeks."

"But that's in the other universe!" Jackie cried.

"And that's why she's breaking down the walls of the universe, cracking it. That's what the spikes are."

"Well, that, and for some reason that I'm the only one that can save the other Doctor from dying."

"What?!"

"I've been having this dream about him dying. And I've just got this feeling that it's real, and I can't let it happen. Like things would go wrong if I didn't stop it."

"Rose, we can worry about him later. Right now, our priority is you. We have to make sure that no one else finds out it's you. We have to monitor your levels, make sure you get enough energy so you don't collapse like you did yesterday!"

"I'll make sure no one at Torchwood gets to close," Pete assured them. "How long will this take?"

"Four days," he told them, no enthusiasm in his voice.

"Days!" Jackie cried, rising from her seat. "She's only going to be here for four days?! Then what? What about the rest of us? Isn't there another way? Can't she stay?"

"No, there isn't. It's too difficult, and too dangerous. Besides that, it would be cruel to keep her here."

"And why's that?"

The Doctor paused and looked at Rose before he answered. "Because if she survives… she's going to be alive for a _very_ long time."

"What do you mean 'a very long time'?" Rose said in confusion.

"Well," he said, then paused again. "It was hard to pick up when I first looked at your results. It was a little confusing, since you were deteriorating at the time, but there was something beneath it. Your cells are regenerating rapidly. Which means you aren't aging and you won't get sick… at least, not by normal standard. This is the exception, because it's causing the deterioration in the first place. Depending on exactly what you've become, you could live for centuries."

"Centuries?" Jackie whispered aghast.

"Which is another reason she has to go. At least if she's with the other Doctor, she won't be alone forever. And there's always Jack."

"I won't be alone," Rose said. "I'm taking you with me."

"I'm only human. I'm going to die one day. Besides that, I don't think _he'll_ be too happy about that."

"Tough. This is my choice."

"Rose," he said evenly, keeping his turbulent emotions at bay, but with a sad, serious look on his face. "We would have to stay with him in the TARDIS. He's me. It would break his hearts."

"I don't care. It was his choice to leave us together, he can deal with that. You never give me a choice. Neither of you. And now it's my turn. If I have to go, I'm taking you with me!"

The Doctor sighed, half in frustration, half in defeat. There was no winning an argument with Rose Tyler. Bloody stubborn woman.

"How about we focus on getting you over there first," Pete said cautiously, trying to calm her down.

"Good idea," the Doctor said, quick to change the subject. "We have a schedule all set out so she can do as many as she can in one day without knocking herself out again."

"Who else knows about this?"

"Just Jack. He's helping us out. I wouldn't trust anyone else. Not with Rose's safety."

"Agreed. No one else is to know. Not even a hint. I'll tell the others you two are off the case, and get Jack to stop them if they get close."

"Because that's not suspicious," Rose said sarcastically, sulking at the Doctor's attitude. "Great idea, take the leading researcher off the case."

"Easy. You've been a bit off the last week or so, you've already told them you're sick. We'll just tell them you've become deathly ill, and the Doctor's trying to make you better. And then, in four or five days time, we tell them you've died."

At this, Jackie looked stony faced, and Rose's brow crumpled. "What about the Doctor?" behind her, the Doctor threw is hands up in a 'I give up' gesture.

"I don't know, died of grief, his life force was tied to yours, he used his energy up trying to save you and turned back into a hand? He's a Metacrisis, anything could be possible. And I bet you if Jack told the rest of the team, that lot would more than likely believe it."

"So… I only have four days left with my daughter?" Jackie said.

"I'm sorry."

A short, sharp laugh burst from her lips. "And just when we thought things were finally going to be okay," she said.

"Tell me about it," Rose sniffed. "I don't want to stay over there. I'd rather just save his butt and come back. I just settled in here."

"You never know, with the knowledge you have when you create the spikes, perhaps you might find a way to communicate with everyone back here," the Doctor suggested. "The gaps in your memory won't last forever. Your mind is still growing, still adjusting. In time you'll learn how to tap into it when you want, rather than on instinct. And you'll be able to recall everything. To be frank, you're most likely to become a genius. You could easily find a way to communicate through the Void."

"You couldn't," she countered.

"I don't have the knowledge you will. You're working with the Time Vortex. You'll know more about it than I ever will. You'll find a way."

"Sure I will," she muttered.

"Oh, stop sulking, Rose Tyler," Jackie scolded.

"I'm not."

"You are so!"

"Well, why is it my life that's always being turned upside down? Just when I finally have what I want, everything is taken away from me. It's not fair."

"I know sweetheart. But, perhaps it was supposed to happen like this. If there's one thing your travelling taught me, pretty much nothing is coincidence."


End file.
